Porter the unhappy English Bulldog is demonstrating for us just how unhappy he is. At first glance, I thought this was a video of a dog that simply could not convince his vocal cords to bark. Then, I thought it was just the world’s most unhappy puppy. But then, upon further reading in the description box, I discovered that Porter is actually the most unhappy dog simply because he does not like being tied up with his leash. And boy, do I feel his pain. When I get to go outside in the backyard by myself, life is goooooood. But as soon as I so much as mention wanting to go into the front yard, I’m strapped with my leash and expected to be happy about being all tied up. If only they would let me run free, I could show them how fun it would be to zip through cars and pee on our neighbors’ front stoops. Why, oh why won’t they just let me show them the beauty that is being an unleashed dog? I’m with you, Porter.