What happens when it’s time to name your puppy

by Bronwyn Hall

Picking a name for your puppy is one of the most stress inducing things that you will experience. Generally, people are aware that choosing the puppy will be hard. Of course you know that training the puppy will be hard. However, nothing can quite prepare you for the anxiety that you will feel when you have to name your puppy.

This anxiety starts about five minutes after you get home with your new family member. It happens somewhere in between the puppy taking its first pee on the rug and you feverishly tightening the puppy harness that you bought because it’s about a cajillion sizes too big.

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Yes, somewhere in all of this chaos it dawns on you. You have to name this little four legged friend of yours. And then you start to freak out. So, first you ask your best friend – Google – what they think you should call the puppy. However, this only makes matters worse because now it’s not just the name you have to think about, oh no! You have to decide whether you want 1 syllable or 2. Three is not an option; you’ve been told this by at least 5 websites. You have to decide whether you want something serious or ironic (we all know how hilarious it is to call your Great Dane Tiny). What about a human name? James the Jack Russell? Rachel the Retriever?

If only you had thought of a name beforehand! Ah, but it’s not that simple. You see, when this little ball of fur arrives home, they may not be the exuberant ‘Skippy’ that you had imagined. You thought that ‘Tarquin’ was going to suit your sophisticated new addition…until you saw him running into the back garden with your Bridget Jones’ in his mouth.

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Once you get to the third page of Google results you know that you really have hit desperation point. So, you pour yourself a large Sauvignon Blanc and click the Google logo. Deep breath. It’s okay, it’s not like anybody is watching. And you can clear your search history anyway.

You start typing…


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